When I start feeling stressed, frustrated, or impatient with situations, I will ask myself, “What Can You Control in this situation?” It’s an amazing cure for my desire to control the situation and make it better.
I learned that question when I took Control Theory by William Glasser. Before I took that training, I found myself trying to control, not only my husband and children, but also my students. The attempt to control others was always an effort in frustration and feelings of failure.
After I took the training, I stopped giving my husband a “To Do” list on Saturday mornings. I shared my new found knowledge with my husband, who was rather sceptical at first because we had had many an argument about my lists. However, I started asking him what his plans were for the weekend. He struggled to believe that I was interested in his plans but eventually he began sharing his list and it was amazing how alike our lists were. However, when I shared my list, he had felt I was trying to control him, but after a while, he realized I was genuine and his lists always had some fun mixed with the work.
I began using this question, motto, with everyone I encountered and it was an amazing release of stress and frustration. My relationships with myself and others also became much healthier.
What is your motto?
