This morning I had the pleasure of listening to John Asaraf speak about how so many of us don’t live our dream life because of fears that hold us back. John spoke of his own fears as a 6 year old boy in Montreal because he could not speak English or French. He only spoke Hebrew. Over time, he overcame his fears and learned English and French. However, such pain comes at a high cost. He was fortunate to meet an amazing mentor at age 19 and has become a world-renowned leader and inspiration to thousands of people around the world through his NeuroGym business.
Like John, I myself had a huge hurdle to overcome at age 6. I suffered alone in silence when the teachers and kids called me “Retard” when I began 1st grade. My older sister was also in 1st grade, cognitively delayed because of being oxygen deprived at birth. She was teased relentlessly and remained in 1st grade until my parents pulled her out of that school at age 12.
I felt insecure and lost and my parents did not know how to help me. They too were being severely criticized by family and community members where we had a small farming business. However, I was fortunate that my 4th grade teacher believed in me and that was the beginning of my belief in myself as a human being. I believe such negative experience can either break you or make you stronger. I was fortunate to have many strong mentors growing up and still surround myself with strong-minded leaders, colleagues, friends and relatives.
Asaraf recommends for us to re-evaluate and retrain our brain. He shared a 4-R Process to releasing our fears. 1.Recognize the patterns of when you are fearful. 2. Reframe your feelings by changing your perspective of your fear and release your fear by saying, “I used to think I’m not smart enough, but now I know I am capable to do whatever I want.” 3. Redirect what you are feeling by releasing it by becoming calm and relaxed. 4. Retrain your brain to think positively of yourself.
I feel excited about the opportunities to teach these steps through “Mindful Leadership.” Please send me your thoughts on this and any other blog posts on my website.
